Wel vir 'n slag kan ek weer die site update, dop vat en kuier. Hopelik is vanaand se party rof en kry ons 'n paar lekker foto's
Vossie, ek het nog nie die foto's van daai straatbraai by daai ander dude gekry nie.
As jy dalk fliek to gaan, kyk vir Iron Man. Dis moerse kwaai. Die vroumense het my ook gedwing om Nim's Island te gaan kyk... wat 'n pot kak!!! As jy eerde by die huis wil bly en DVD's kyk, veral met die weer wat nou so piskoud is in die aande, kry vir jou Stonecold se nuwe movie, Condemned. Dis nou hoe 'n skop, skiet en (hard) doner fliek moet wees.
Hier is so paar cool engels grappe
I was at my bank today. There was a short line. Just one lady in front of me.
An Asian lady who was trying to exchange yen for dollars. It was obvious she was a little irritated . . .
She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla fo yen.
Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?" The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations."
The Asian lady says, "Fluc you people, too!"
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The guy orders a beer. The bartender fills the mug and slides it down the bar. It hits the lady's boobs and splashes all over them. The bartender goes over, retrieves the mug and licks the beer off the blonde. Each time he calls for a beer this happens. So after his third beer, he decides to help the bartender out. The next time the bartender hits her boobs, the man jumps up and starts to lick her breasts...AND SHE DECKS HIM!!!.
He's laying on the floor moaning and groaning, "Jeez...then why do you let the bartender do it?"
"Because," says the blonde, "he has a licker license !"
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A woman decides to have a face lift for her 50th birthday. She spends $15,000 and feels pretty good about the results. On her way home, she stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving, she says to the clerk, 'I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?' About 32,' is the reply. 'Nope! I'm exactly 50,' the woman says happily. A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl the very same question. The girl replies, 'I'd guess about 29.'
The woman replies with a big smile, 'Nope, I'm 50.' Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store on her way down the street. She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning question. The clerk responds, 'Oh, I'd say 30.' Again she proudly responds, 'I'm 50, but thank you!'
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question. He replies,'I'm 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young, there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are.' They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the best of her. She finally blurts out, 'What the hell, go ahead.'
He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each breast and he gently
pinches each nipple. He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other. After a couple of minutes of this, she says, 'Okay, okay...How old am I?'
He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, 'Madam, you are 50.' Stunned and amazed, the woman says, 'That was incredible, how could you tell?' The old man says, 'Promise you won't get mad?' 'I promise I won't,' she says.
'I was behind you in McDonald's.'
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A hillbilly farmer who wanted to get a divorce paid a visit to a lawyer. The lawyer said, "How can I help you?" The farmer said, "I want to get one of them dayvorces."
The lawyer said, "Do you have any grounds?" The farmer said, "Yes, I got 40 acres" The lawyer said, "No, No, you don't understand, Do you have a suit?
The farmer said, "Yes, I got a suit, I wears it to church on Sundays." The lawyer said, "No, no, I mean, do you have a case?" The farmer said, "No, I ain't got a Case, but I got a John Deere.
The lawyer said, "No, I mean, do you have a grudge?" The farmer said,"Yes, I got a grudge, that's where I parks the John Deere"
The lawyer said, "Does your wife beat you up or something?" The farmer said, "No, we both get up at 4:30."
By now the lawyer is getting frustrated but tries one last question .The lawyer said, "Is your wife a nagger?" The farmer said, "No, she's a little white gal, but our last child was a nagger and that's why I wants a dayvorce."
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An Israeli doctor says: "Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks."!
A British doctor says: "That is nothing; we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks.
A Canadian doctor says: "In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks."
A Zimbabwean doctor: not to be outdone, says: "You guys are way behind, We just took a man with no brain - made him President, and now the whole country is looking for work.
Nou ja, tot volgende week dan....
